Wow…The Safest Way To Lose Your Virginity…Robotically


Holy sexy automatons, virgin-man! That’s right, if you didn’t somehow already know of sexbots (let’s be honest, if you’re on this website then you already do) they are a real and growing phenomenon and some “experts” warn that future extensive use of these poor, abused machines might make people less sexually social.

Who would of thunk?

Wow…The Safest Way To Lose Your Virginity…Robotically

Speaking at the Cheltenham Science Festival, professor Noel Sharkey from Sheffield University warned that future teenagers might begin to lose their virginity to sex robots and that android sex dolls may have damaging consequences for society.

“Sex robots are accessible now and certainly [will be common] within the next 10 years,” Sharkey noted. “I think there will be an age limit. Certainly there should be, but if your dad or mum had one, you could sneak in and use it.”

Um, that’s f^*#ing gross…

“It’s not a problem having sex with a machine,” added the increasingly creepy professor. “But, what if it’s your first time, your first relationship? What do you think of the opposite sex then? What do you think a man or a woman is?”

Warm and fun?

“It will get in the way of real life, stopping people forming relationships with normal people.”

The answer of causality is still up for debate (which came first? The socially inept sex fiend or the life-size Swiss army sex toy?).

According to Mirror, there has also been a warning that the rise of sex robots could cause performance anxiety in men and women who fear they can’t match the lovemaking skills of “amorous androids.”

Artificial intelligence expert David Levy predicts that as people get more comfortable with robotics, sexual relations (maybe even love and marriage) with androids will become more and more popular. A conservative fever dream if I’ve ever heard of one.

The concern by many experts like Levy and Sharkey is that these male and female sex robots will be built to the user’s specific ideals of perfection, and those users with less-than-perfect human bodies could become anxious about whether their partner is pleased by them.

Oh sure, Bobby, blame the defenseless robots for your failed marriage and impotency!

Sorry, back on topic.

Levy, the author of ‘Love And Sex With Robots’, told the Toronto Star robots that are “wonderful lovers” could cause “performance anxiety” among men and women.

Meanwhile, new research has found that one in four young people in the UK would happily date a robot, just as long as their android beau was a “perfect match”, and looked like a real-life human being.

“Our bodies, our identities and our senses are enhancing thanks to technology and societal shifts,” said Ghislaine Boddington, co-founder and creative director of East London design unit body>data>space.

To quote the words of the immortal Futurama, “Have you any idea how it feels being a fembot in a manbot’s manputer’s world?”


Do you eagerly await the days when you can literally turn on your partner by flipping a switch? Do you suffer with bouts of social anxiety when thinking about the horizontal tango? Are you disgusted by the thought of sexbots? Sound off: comment below and share on Facebook!