Just when the Christmas hype starts to settles down, it builds right back up in time for New Year’s Eve. It’s supposed to be a time to celebrate the year that was and look forward to the year that’s to come, but instead, it’s turned into a time to get slobbery drunk, make a fool of yourself, and blow all your money. Now you get to start the New Year feeling like sh*t, embarrassed you stripped in front of strangers, and broke as a joke.
And those are only a couple of reasons why New Year’s Eve is completely overrated.
New Year’s Eve sucks because it’s amateur night. Everyone under 50 who can’t hold their liquor ventures out on New Year’s Eve to cause ruckus and pandemonium. With all the novices out there, sometimes it’s just easier to stay in, where you won’t have to elbow your way to the bar, fight all the drunks for a stall in the bathroom, and deal with the girl drunk-crying about who knows what.
It’s New Year’s Eve, and the booze flows quickly. You’re drinking fancy drinks with enough alcohol in them to start your car, doing shots with friends and strangers, and drinking champagne out of the bottle. You’re having a blast, until the last shot of Southern Comfort isn’t so comfortable. Then you find yourself head down in a dirty toilet praying that it’s your hair you just pulled out of your mouth, not something you picked up from the porcelain throne. Nobody wants to start the New Year with a two-day hangover, but when you hit it hard New Year’s Eve, that’s exactly what happens.
For some unknown reason, people build grandiose expectations for New Year’s Eve. It has to be the biggest party, with the loudest music, and the longest guest list to be the best night of the year. Well, that’s a pretty high expectation to hold up to and when the night doesn’t meet the unrealistic goals you’ve set for it, it only leads to disappointment.
It’s 11:55 pm. You look around for your date and realize she left a half an hour ago with a guy who looked like he could be a linebacker for the Pittsburgh Steelers. Couples are starting to form all around you, staring up at the television waiting for that special moment. You start to panic because you realize that in less than five minutes, everyone but you is going to be bringing in the New Year with a kiss. Instead of feeling like a fool, you head to the bathroom to hide, feeling sorry for yourself for being single.
New Year’s Eve is one of the most dangerous nights of the year to drive and cops are constantly on the prowl. Taxis are impossible to find and you don’t really want to have to call your dad to come get you and your buddies like you’re still 16. So you’re left with two options. Stay home and stay safe, or drunk stumble across town in the freezing cold only to reach your apartment and realize you left your keys at the bar.
New Year’s is the time of year to start fresh, make yourself better and set unrealistic goals you can’t meet. If you want to make changes in your life, just do it. Do it today, not on New Year’s Eve. Only 8 percent of people actually keep their New Year’s resolutions; the rest of us just feel like sh*t for not keeping our own.
Over Christmas, you drained your savings account buying gifts for family and friends. You watched their eyes light up while they opened presents and you feel like it was money well spent. But now your friends want you to go out for New Year’s Eve. Be prepared to drop another $500 on wining and dining, taxi rides, and a hotel room. And the only thing you’ll have to show for it, other than the overdraft fees from your bank, is a headache and a misplaced shoe.
Since you’ve been old enough to stay up late, you’ve watched the ball drop every year. It is the same exact thing every single time and, if you’re honest with yourself, it’s not really that exciting. It takes the damn thing way too long to creep to the ground and it doesn’t even blow up. It’s a huge lead up to the same thing you’ve seen every New Year’s Eve since the ball started dropping in 1907.