Ruby Rose Langenheim  is so much more than the hottest new name on a popular Netflix series. Yes, she’s a model, a DJ, a MTV VJ, actress and an artist, but more than that, she’s role modeling being comfortable with who you are and encouraging others to stop trying to fit in a box.

The Australian actress has joined the third season of Orange Is the New Black, which was released on June 12th, as inmate Stella Carlin. And, if you’re a fan of OITNB, you won’t be surprised to hear that this sexy new inmate has all the convicts’ panties in a twist.

And most of America.

As die hard fans binged on the Netflix show, and the character of Stella was introduced, social media exploded as new fans, male and female, gay and straight, professed attraction to the 29 year old, regardless of sex and gender.

Ruby Rose, who says she’s gender fluid, told Elle magazine:

Gender fluidity is not really feeling like you’re at one end of the spectrum or the other. For the most part, I definitely don’t identify as any gender. I’m not a guy; I don’t really feel like a woman, but obviously I was born one. So, I’m somewhere in the middle, which – in my perfect imagination – is like having the best of both sexes. I have a lot of characteristics that would normally be present in a guy and then less that would be present in a woman. But then sometimes I’ll put on a skirt – like today.

Ruby isn’t the first person to feel this way, and she won’t be the last. But she’s one of the first to be publicly open, without shame and without fear of what other’s think.

And that’s one of the things that make her so damn hot. With a blend of both masculine and feminine, Ruby Rose exhibits confidence and sexuality with an attitude that says she isn’t going to take shit from anybody. She’s alright with who she is and comfortable in her own skin, even if that skin defies definition.

In her self-produced, five minute video, Break Free, Ruby Rose starts as a “traditional” beauty: Blonde hair, red lips, and curves that can wreck a car. Through the video, she transitions. Her hair gets short. Turns dark. The make-up is washed from her body, and bit by bit, her tattoos start to appear. She wipes her face clean. She dons her androgynous style, and, at the end when she can neither be described as male or female, pretty much tells anyone who doesn’t like it to fuck off.

Stars that Have Led the Way

Ruby Rose’s character isn’t the first star on OITNB to be non-traditional. Set in a female prison, the show is filled with lesbian sex and roles that can’t be defined. On the show since the beginning, Laverne Cox, who plays Sophia Burset, is openly transgender (both on screen and off) and the first openly transgender person to be on the cover of Time magazine.

And don’t get me wrong, there have been plenty of stars that have lead the way before the Netflix hit.

Richard O’Brien, the mastermind behind The Rocky Horror Picture Show, has admitted to struggling with gender roles throughout his life and states that he maybe transgendered or third sex.

Miley Cyrus has had an androgynous style during recent years, and stated the following on a Facebook Q and A, “I never wanted to label myself, I am ready to love anyone that loves me for who I am. I am open.”

In an interview with Variety, actress Cate Blanchett said she has had relationships with women in the past. When rumors started to spread, Blanchett pulled a press conference and, when talking about sexuality and gender, said in perfect simplicity, “In 2015, the point should be: Who cares?”

Even Aerosmith star Steven Tyler doesn’t fit into the stereotypical gender roles. In his memoir, Does the Noise in My Head Bother You, he said:

I’ve been misquoted as saying that I’m more female than male, let me set the record straight — it’s more half and half, and I love the fact that my feelings are akin to puella eternis (Latin for ‘the eternal girl’). What better to be like than the stronger of the species?

And with the public transformation of Caitlyn Jenner, it seems our society has started to move in the direction of acceptance and is, perhaps finally, ready to allow people to be as they are, regardless of definition.

What Exactly Is Gender Fluidity?

For the longest time, society pushed the idea that when it came to sexuality and gender, it was black or white. There were no shades of grey. There were men and there were women. There were straight people and gay people. And all of these people were neatly tied up in their pretty little boxes and everyone fit in one.

But that’s just not the case.

Both sexuality and gender can range a thousand degrees from male and female, gay and straight. And with many people, it can be fluid, changing over time, back and forth, and not definable.

While society tries to stick to its straight forward definitions, people have known for a long time that it doesn’t work that way. In 1948, Alfred Kinsey and his colleagues Wardell Pomeroy and Clyde Martin released the results from a study, a chart named the Kinsey Scale; a tool that showed sexuality and gender are not black and white and can change over time.

Kinsey believed that when it can to sexual behaviors, there was no normal and abnormal, and that totally straight and gay were typically not the case.

It’s sad to think that it’s taken 67 years for American society to get on board.

How to Know if You’re Gender Fluid?

For the many people who have never felt they “fit in” or where “normal,” the gender fluidity movement allows them to simply be, without feeling that they’re different or wrong in some way.

If you’ve ever wondered if your desires were not the norm, there’s multiple gender and sexuality tests available. Here’s a few to try:

Remember, one of the primary aspects of gender fluidity is that gender and sexuality do not need to be defined. They simply are.

Be yourself. Accept yourself. Love you as you are.


 How do you define yourself? Have you had difficulty defining your gender or sexuality? Are you gender fluid? Share your experiences in the comments.

Additional Image: Daily Mail



Molly Carter
Molly Carter
Molly is a freelance writer who talks about everything and anything from addiction, to sex. to skinning a deer. You can find her at, or Facebook.