A little over a month ago, someone, somewhere, with pretty much nothing else to do decided to announce to the world (in the most pathetic, most injured voice possible) “Hey, why isn’t there a Heterosexual Pride Day?”
Coming from an ambiguously heterosexual white male (and I am very much all of those things), let this visual tongue lashing, metaphorical, and with any luck, digital slap in the stupefied face tell you exactly why there isn’t a “Heterosexual Pride Day.”
Open those head holes and adsorb some damn knowledge!
#heterosexualprideday is the same things as #alllivesmatter foh pic.twitter.com/idaUhWk8SP
— Genevieve Vavance (@Tommygurl1294) June 29, 2016
It all started in late june of 2016 when the hashtag #HeterosexualPrideDay began trending worldwide on Twitter.
There were the vocal supporters (most of whom sat somewhere between pridefully ignorant and overtly homophobic) and the supporters (with nearly just as many shades of gray hypocrisy and passion spewing from their collective fingertips and smartphones).
Posts started popping up all over the place emphasizing the clear stupidity of it all.
Like this one:
This. 10/10 #HeterosexualPrideDay pic.twitter.com/PJX5UHkooo
— Kara (@KMoneyDaBoss) June 29, 2016
and this one:
In red are all the countries where it is illegal to be heterosexual. Heartbreaking. 😔💔🙏🏻#HeterosexualPrideDay pic.twitter.com/9kG2mVhLbT
— Lady Gaga (@KingLadyGaga) June 29, 2016
But, if you look closely enough, which in this case could theoretically be from across a baseball stadium thanks to the clarity and objectiveness of this entire “debate,” you would see the similarities between the “Heterosexual Pride Day” people and the “All Lives Matter” people.
In both situations, the vast majority of the proponents of HPD and ALM are white heterosexual males. Many of them are of a demographic that regularly tunes into a certain 24-hour news outlet that is currently thinning the herd, if you will, of its more “rape-y” upper echelon.
The exact kind of person that has seen little hardship or struggle from external sources. Therefore, they see any cause or celebration that doesn’t directly address them as hostile.
It was summed up, yet again (as if it even needed clarification in 2016), perfectly by this post:
If you genuinely feel you need a #HeterosexualPrideDay, read this: pic.twitter.com/KtZ9Xnlinm
— Blaine Stewart (@BlaineStewart) June 29, 2016
It is not the subject of the celebration that is the point, but rather the need to gather in large enough groups necessary for personal safety to be able to be openly free and at peace, if even for a single day.
So the next time you fear the invasion of homosexual “lifestyles” just remember that nowhere in the world is it illegal to be heterosexual. Nowhere in the world are your rights stripped away because of your heterosexuality and never will that be the case. Nowhere in the world are you assaulted, robbed, ridiculed, shamed, discouraged, converted from, or denied service for being heterosexual.