How 50 Shades of Grey Got It All Wrong

Christian Grey, the title character from E.L. James’ bestselling novel “50 Shades of Grey,” evokes an image of power and control both in and out of the office. The novel is most famous for detailing Grey’s BDSM lifestyle, which involves Grey being in control of a female submissive. A new investigative memoir, however, suggests “50 Shades of Grey” got it all wrong, that powerful men like Christian Grey actually prefer to be the submissive.

The author of this investigative piece, Joyce Snyder, is shaking up James’ image of Grey that readers around the world have fantasized about. In the memoir, titled “Mistress Pussycat: Adventures with Submissive Men in the World of Femdom,” Snyder writes that important, strong men are more turned on when their partner is the one in control and commanding them around in the bedroom. She suggests these types of men love being made fun of and demeaned.

“Femdom,” short for female domination of submissive men, is a sub-culture becoming more and more popular in the United States. One group alone called ClubFEM, has 21 chapters in the US. Snyder wrote this piece when she was assigned the topic for work. In it, she writes about all of the different men she met and the acts they craved. Below are a few of the different varieties Snyder experienced.

1. Adult Babies

Men who gain non-sexual satisfaction from acting like a baby are known as Adult Babies or Littles. These men get pleasure out of wetting their diapers, splashing around during bath time, and receiving a spanking when they’ve misbehaved. By day, the men that enjoy this are usually professionals and may even attend organized conventions for Littles.

2. Male Chastity Devices

There are several different types of male chastity devices, some with clever names like the Buddy-Lock. These won’t be satisfying for a guy at first, but eventually, they could gain enjoyment from them. The basic idea behind chastity devices is the dominant woman is in charge of when the submissive man orgasms.

3. Pay Pigs and Princesses

In this scenario, the dominant female, called a “princess,” insults and degrades her submissive male, known as a “pay pig,” by doing things like calling him names. In response to the princess’ name-calling, the pay pig gives her money and gifts. Usually, the two never meet in person, as transactions and conversations are done solely online. Being financially manipulated is what turns these guys on.

4. Slaves

Men who enjoy being slaves to their owners are usually very successful in their field of work. Slaves are fully submissive to their owners, who tie them up, punish and embarrass them. Out of all of the other sexual lifestyles mentioned, this seems to be growing the fastest, with over 100 chapters across the United States alone.


Did you find “50 Shades of Grey” to be realistic?




Kirstin Wright
Kirstin Wright
Kirstin is an IT worker by day and a freelance writer by night. When not behind a computer screen, she can be found exploring one of central Florida's famous theme parks or embarking on a new adventure. You can read about her adventures at Fun Orlando Ideas!